Eric Abetz's abortion backtrack: an opportunity to study Liberal spin in its natural habitat | Amy Gray | Comment is free | theguardian.com

Eric Abetz's abortion backtrack: an opportunity to study Liberal spin in its natural habitat | Amy Gray | Comment is free | theguardian.com

Eric Abetz's abortion backtrack: an opportunity to study Liberal spin in its natural habitat

Abetz’s
‘clarifying’ remarks are a great opportunity to observe Liberal
politicians’ spin when they’re caught in the wrong – it’s like watching
an animal documentary

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    Amy Gray
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    theguardian.com,
    Friday 8 August 2014 10.37 AEST
    
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    Jump to comments (378)
    

Eric Abetz during question time. Photograph: Mike Bowers

Last night, openly anti-abortion but pro-job-application senator Eric Abetz linked breast cancer and abortion on a TV interview with Channel 10’s the Project.

This
morning, the senator claims he “studiously avoided’’ linking breast
cancer with abortion. Not only that but, that he was “cut off before
being able to acknowledge that Dr Angela Lanfranchi’s views on this topic
were not the accepted medical view’’. This will be news to anyone who
watched him gruffly cite previous medical studies, only to witness his
collapsing brow when told the Australian Medical Association think
Lanfranchi’s views are rubbish.

Abetz’s clarifying remarks are a
classic opportunity to observe up close the how Liberal politicians try
to deny they’ve laid a big, steaming turd of stupidity stinking up the
nation. Put your best David Attenborough voice on for this.

1. Claim it was someone else’s fault

This
is the classic opening manoeuvre from a Liberal politician under
attack. When cornered, the politician will emit a loud screech blaming
others for their idiocy. If yelled loudly enough, defence cries of
“studiously avoided” or “[I] was cut off” can momentarily stun your
pursuers.

This defence move is one of noise and hope, a hope the
predators cornering the threatened Liberal won’t remember he said “I
think the studies, and I think they date back from the 1950s, assert
that there is a link between abortion and breast cancer” a mere 12 hours
ago on national TV.

2. Give a slightly clarifying remark that acknowledges there are rational people out there

In
a dance between life and bad polling death, this is where we see the
threatened Liberal try to placate the pursuers who shrilly yell
something about overwhelming scientific evidence.

Note how it
almost sounds reasonable when Abetz says “Angela Lanfranchi’s views on
this topic were not the accepted medical view” and “as I pointed out, I
am associating myself with the Families Conference, the broad aims of
which I support. This does not mean that I endorse the views of every
single speaker.”

The effect on the pursuers is immediate – they
pause in their chase, unprepared for this shock move of a Liberal
politician to show logic.

3. Go full on with the cognitive dissonance denial

Emboldened
by his move, the Liberal politician starts to edge away from danger so
he can retreat to the safety that can only be found in the arms of other
deeply conservative rich men who like mining both the earth and rights
of others.

Every move is critical to ensure his escape. Just as
critical though is the Liberal’s need to ensure his pack of Liberals and
the conservative hate-mongers who fund them will accept him as one of
their own on his return and not ostracise him as bearing the stench of
logic.

He plays a desperate move to show he is still one of them.
It’s a fascinating move, not unlike a mating ritual, to court his
pack’s approval. He gives credence to Lanfranchi, implying she deserves
professional respect to say things the entire medical and scientific
community disagrees with: “Notwithstanding this, Lanfranchi is a breast
cancer surgeon and a clinical assistant professor of surgery. She is the
surgical co-director of the Sanofi-Aventis Breast Care Centre and the
Steeplechase Cancer Centre in New Jersey.”

It’s a bold move and
the pack are at full attention. Kevin Andrews, international ambassador
for the World Congress of Families and Minister for Social Services,
stops writing Abetz a voucher for Liberal counselling and watches
keenly. Abetz has shown his previously clarifying remarks were empty and
designed only to silence the critics nipping at his heels. He is still
part of the Liberal pack.

4. Deliver the coup de grace

Witnessing Abetz’s mating ritual to his pack, the predators howl and renew their pursuit of the senator.

Out
in the animal kingdom, many creatures have unique defence mechanisms:
squids shoot ink, possums play dead, lizards change colour. But the
Liberal politician is different and instead yells something, hoping
their words will form a smoke screen allowing them to depart unseen.

“Lanfranchi
has the right to free speech in Australia.” It is a cry that distances
him from his pursuers and gets him closer to his awaiting pack.

The
yell of BECAUSE FREE SPEECH is a desperate move, one certain to anger
his pursuers. He chose well though; his escape would be doomed if he
yelled out the other classic Liberal party responses of TERRORISTS,
BUDGET EMERGENCY! or even STOP THE BOATS. The plucky senator, relieved
and safe from danger, returns to his nest lined with job applications.

In
our next episode of Liberals out in the wild, we see what happens when
Liberals reject one of their own. A small, frightened Brandis Metadatum
out in the wild and on the run from conservatives and progressives
alike. Thrilling stuff.